Cocaine and Hookers*: A Day In The Life of A Writer

049 AC-DC 28VI10

You mean you don’t start your day with ‘Rock and Roll Damnation’? (Photo credit: Dena Flows)

Sometime before dawn: wake up to the Bitey Cat living up to her name and biting my nose. But not hard. Just enough to let me know that she could easily kill me while I sleep, but chooses not to for reasons of her own.

Dawn: Have first cup of tea. Watch sunrise. Note that the world failed to end last night again.

Immediately after dawn: Write the day’s blog post if one is needed. If not, spend some time replying to comments/emails from blog if any. If none, then dick around on the internet. Listen to The Husband doing yoga. Put some AC/DC on my headphones. Work on my Brian Johnson impression.

Breakfast: Coffee. Food. More coffee.

Morning: Zero-draft writing on short stories, occasionally interrupted by coffee breaks, text messages, and other ideas that don’t have the common decency to wait until I’m not so fucking busy.

Later that morning: Stare blankly at screen, feeling sure I used to know what word came next…

Still later: Drown doubts with coffee.

Before lunch: Run. Spend half of run imagining fictional characters on a treadmill. Laugh at the ones that fall. Nearly fall myself because of distraction.

Lunch: Refuel and disconnect the morning’s brain, setting it free to roam in the backyard.

Afternoon: Switch to Editing Brain. Work on most demanding project, ranked by due date or level of badness. Weigh choices, because there’s never just one. Start making lists of everything that’s wrong with these projects. Pick one with smaller list. Realize the list is still fucking huge. Get over it.

Later that afternoon: Coffee break, because sometimes you’ve got to get out and push your creativity up the road like a burned out car.

Still later that afternoon: Stare blankly at the screen, wondering what the hell I was thinking when I wrote this. Or if I did. It doesn’t sound familiar. Surely I wouldn’t have misspelled ‘it’.

Even later that afternoon: Daily cigarette urge. Remember I quit. Swear.

Dinner Time: Food and regrouping with the Husband.

Evening: Check brain levels. Spend dark hours doing something fun, like drawing, gaming, or recreational stabbing.** Make a plan for tomorrow.

Rinse. Repeat.

*Actual day may not contain cocaine or hookers.

**I prefer this name for fencing.


6 thoughts on “Cocaine and Hookers*: A Day In The Life of A Writer

  1. LOL. This is great, Knuckles. Seems like there should be some room in there for a little cocaine and maybe a hooker or two, but you sound pretty busy as it is. Hey, this is a typical day? Do you have a . . . um . . . day job–you know the one that pays the bills?

    • This is a pretty typical day, because I do administrative work from home. I get a good bit of it done in the morning, especially before breakfast. Then I switch back and forth between writing and other work through the rest of the day, but I edited out the stuff like “write copy for postings” and “file mileage logs” and “redo yesterday’s paperwork” in the interests of brevity. And for the lolz.

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